My name is Barbara Thieme. Since 2010, I have been dedicated to supporting mothers as they navigate the challenges of living with narcissistic or emotionally and physically abusive partners. Originally from Germany, I founded the German Mütterlobby (Lobby for Mothers), where our blog and social media platforms focused on empowering mothers and raising awareness about their struggles. Life took a turn, and in 2016, I moved to the United States.
In 2021, I founded FOLLOW and with the backing of a small team, I have been providing webinars on these critical issues since 2022, ensuring that mothers have access to the support they need.
My Background
My journey started as a paralegal in Germany, where I gained valuable insights despite not remaining in the role for long. In Germany, I am a certified business consultant, a licensed naturopath with the focus on mental health, and hold a Bachelor of Science in Communication. With extensive experience in personnel development and change management, my professional background has equipped me to guide and support mothers through challenging and often overwhelming situations.
While I do not offer legal advice—this remains the role of your attorney—I am committed to working alongside your legal team to ensure that strategies align with the well-being of you and your child.
Our Vision for a Child-Centered Family Law System
A child’s well-being is of utmost importance, and they deserve to grow up in a peaceful environment, even if that means being raised by just one emotionally and mentally healthy parent. In the cases we handle, this parent is often the mother. When cooperation between parents is impossible due to abuse or aggression, it’s crucial to identify who is causing the conflict. To protect the child from harm, it may be necessary to limit or even completely stop contact with the abusive parent, at least temporarily.
We strongly oppose forced alternating residence model, which are often imposed on mothers against their will. These arrangements can only be successful when all parties involved—mother, father, and child—agree to them voluntarily. In many cases, the fathers who insist on shared parenting are the same ones who neglected their parental responsibilities during the relationship, driven by a desire for power, control, and the avoidance of alimony.
We support a caregiving model that reflects the parenting dynamics established during the relationship, with adjustments made as needed to prioritize the child’s well-being.
Safty First!
The safety of mothers and children must be the highest priority, particularly in cases involving physical or psychological violence. Ignoring the past and focusing only on the future is unacceptable. To protect the child, it is essential to understand the history of abuse and make informed decisions based on that knowledge.
The “Safety First” principle is the only appropriate response to domestic violence – regardless of whether it was physical or emotional violence. The primary caregiver, typically the mother, is the expert on her child’s needs, and professionals in the system should be there to support, not undermine, her role.